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Opining of a Cranky Old Man
Rants and Raves from a Michigan Retiree Watching the
World Go Round
Royal Wedding earns a major 'rant' but Prince may be
right in fuel for his car
By Bill Kalmar, Retiree
 May
5, 2011 - Sitting here in my home office contemplating another dreary
day in Michigan. When will all this rotten weather come to an end! And
don’t even mention that dirty rotten rat, AKA Punxsutawney Phil, who
predicted an early spring! He better not poke his head out especially
while my two friends Cooter and Bubba are hunting for him!
There is something wrong when our furnace comes on
in May. We should be hearing the whirl of the air conditioner. Well,
maybe I shouldn’t be complaining especially when you consider what has
been happening in the southern states with tornadoes. But I digress. As
such, let me spend a couple of minutes cogitating on what is troubling
me these days. And just maybe I will have something to crow about.
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First of all are we finally done with all the Royal
Wedding hoopla? Did people really rise at 4:00AM to view this spectacle
on television? I sure didn’t! Seemed a bit over the top, especially when
we learned that the cost was about $65 million.
Does anyone know what the Royal Family does for a
living? We know that Prince Charles just pins medals on people. And
let’s not forget that he has someone place toothpaste on his tooth brush
each morning. And how about this for the height of indulgence - the
Aston Martin automobile that his son William drove through the streets
of London after the wedding had been converted to run on distilled wine
by Charles.
Well, people seem to think that the wedding was a
distraction from all the troubles in the world. Frankly, I have
difficulty getting excited about attending weddings for our own
relatives, so please spare me all the coverage of the Royal Wedding.
Evidently the newlyweds provided a level of
excitement for all those in London who are unemployed and on the dole. I
guess seeing the happy faces of William and Kate hasn’t been matched
since we witnessed the rollicking that went on between Michael Jackson
and Bubbles the Chimp!
And finally here’s a rule of etiquette that I would
have difficulty adhering to had I been invited to this over- the-top
event -- when the Queen stops eating, everyone has to stop eating. Can’t
you just imagine people stopping halfway through putting some food in
their mouth?
My reaction? I would say: “Hey Queenie, pass me the
plate of chicken wings. I’m still hungry and I’m not done yet!” Guess
that comment assures that I won’t be invited to the Palace. Frankly, I
don’t care. Sorry if I sound disrespectful but there is something
humorous about people who like to dress up in formal attire and then
place extravagant hats on their head that resemble flying saucers or
fruit baskets.
Now to be fair to those people who watched this
extravaganza all weekend, there was another event that defies logic.
Seems the National Football League (NFL) took an entire weekend to
broadcast the College Football Draft.
This is where the NFL teams barter for various
college players. Each team takes a set amount of time to announce who
they will sign for a long-term contract. Talk about boring! But over 42
million sports fans and people with excessive time on their hands and no
life stayed glued to their televisions while this event took place.
How many times can one watch a hyped college player
place a hat on his head signifying the team that just chose him?
Actually, it’s a toss up between watching this or watching paint dry!
And now for my rave.
How about those brave Navy Seals who eliminated the
world’s #1 Must Hunted Criminal! These are brave Americans who epitomize
what is great about our country. Their commitment and valor is
unparalleled and we owe them a tremendous amount of gratitude not only
for this episode but for all the other encounters they are involved in
when we are not even aware.
I had the privilege of meeting a Navy Seal several
years ago and was duly impressed. He was not pretentious or boasting but
quiet and professional. So let’s never forget the dedication of these
courageous men and thank them everyday for protecting our freedoms.
And one last rant
Well, that’s it for the time being. But in closing
one last rant on the current gas prices. What with the price of a gallon
hovering around $4.50 a gallon, maybe Prince Charles has something to
consider about burning wine in our tanks. Last I looked, a gallon of
Mogen David wine was around $4.60. Hmm! Maybe I have underestimated him
after all. Not!
L Bill Kalmar is retired in Lake Orion, Michigan,
and is the former Director of the Michigan Quality Council. He is a
frequent contributor to SeniorJournal.com. His opinions are his own.
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