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Opining of a Cranky Old Man
Let’s Opine About the Swine! Stirs Memory of Y2K
Scare that Evaporated at Stroke of Midnight
Hoping to hear those soothing words from Porky the
Pig – ‘That’s all folks!’ - signaling the conclusion of all this flu madness
By Bill Kalmar, Retiree
 May
18, 2009 - Now that “Breaking News” about impending snowstorms has
dissipated, the media has a new reason to interrupt our restful
television watching by bombarding us with swine flu updates. As each new
suspected case of the flu surfaces we are informed about it in almost
breathless recitations from reporters on the scene.
Even before the individual’s symptoms have been
analyzed by the Center for Disease Control (CDC) we are told that a
school will close for an undetermined amount of time. The reporter then
stares into the camera reporting this information in a fashion similar
to reporting space ship landings. It reminds me somewhat of the Y2K
scare that evaporated at the stroke of midnight. Much to do about
nothing!
 Certainly
I am not a physician, nor do I play one on TV, but here are my thoughts
on what some are calling a pandemic:
● The high school revelers who traveled to
Mexico for drinking and debauchery brought the flu back to the states
and frankly they are not the victims – we are the victims of their
immaturity and selfishness. To them it is a right of passage to travel
to a country allowing underage drinking.
China has the right idea regarding those suspected
of being infected with the flu – at a Hong Kong Hotel no one was allowed
to leave during a seven-day incubation period. Certainly if that were to
take place in Mexico maybe our world traveling students would opt for a
more responsible spring break in their own country!
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● Pork producers are livid over the reference
to “swine” flu because as they say, people do not get sick from eating
pork. They would rather have us refer to the illness as the H1N1 flu.
And I suspect that poultry farmers don’t like the term “bird flu”. How
about renaming the “shingles” illness so as not to anger roofers! Where
does it end!
● Vice President Biden in his usual
inimitable oral leakage suggested that no one fly commercially. As an
example to the nation that maybe he misspoke, the obstreperous Biden
recently took a train from Washington to his home state of Delaware.
His “shooting from the hip” has often made him the
ridicule of late night comics and thus he continues to provide them with
material. Maybe President Obama should provide Biden with his own
special flu mask one that would camouflage him from the flu but also
camouflage us from his extraneous comments!
● And speaking of the President, he cautioned
Americans to wash their hands frequently. To some this was just a
reaffirmation of what many are already doing. Unfortunately, there are
some in our society who will find this to be an imposition since this
notion of hand washing to them is an anathema, as it would likely have a
positive impact on their hygiene lapses.
● Somehow a hog farmer in Canada with the flu
transferred it to his herd of piglets. How that occurred will remain a
mystery but perhaps that is a story for Larry King to unravel.
In summary, people contract the flu and flu
symptoms all the time in this country and people have been known to die
as a result and that is disturbing. But up until now those cases were
not catalogued by the media in such a frenetic fashion, contrary to what
we have been deluged with recently.
And, depending on which so-called “expert” is
discussing the current strain of the flu, it is either problematic or
not.
And, while all this is transpiring, the producers
of Purell and other hand cleansers are having a field day as sales are
booming. In the meantime, I’m just hoping to hear those soothing words
from Porky the Pig signaling the conclusion of all this madness when he
chortles: “That’s all folks!”
L Bill Kalmar is retired in Lake Orion, Michigan,
and is the former Director of the Michigan Quality Council. He is a
frequent contributor to SeniorJournal.com. His opinions are his own.
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