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Boomers Hesitant to Discuss End-of-Life Issues with
Aging Parents
Senior citizen parents more willing to have such
discussions
Sept. 19, 2005 – Baby Boomers have much more
trouble discussing sensitive matters about financial planning, medical
care and end-of-life issues with their senior citizen parents than do
these parents now in their 70s. Hartford Financial Services Group,
sponsor of the research, says there are ways to improve this
communications.
The research, conducted by Mathew Greenwald &
Associates as part of The Hartford's "Family Conversations" series,
shows that older parents and their children need some help when
discussing often uncomfortable estate planning issues. These older
parents are also more interested in helping their children financially
than their children realize, according to the research.
In response, The Hartford has created its Family
Conversations Estate Planning Program to help bridge the imagined gap
that sometimes divides generations. The program is available through
financial professionals, including stockbrokers, financial planners,
banks, insurance agents and others.
This is the second of The Hartford's Family
Conversations programs. The first report, dealing with how families can
discuss when the time is right for older drivers to moderate or stop
driving, was issued in 2004.
"Older adults tell us they really do want to
discuss topics such as estate planning, medical care and final
arrangements with their children," said Maureen Mohyde, director of The
Hartford's corporate gerontology group. "Because Boomers are often
uncomfortable discussing these matters with their parents, The Hartford
is offering some important ideas to bring them together."
The Hartford's research, which surveyed older
parents between the ages of 70-79 and adults between the ages of 45-65,
primarily Boomers, with at least one living parent, made the following
key findings:
> 76 percent of older parents say they are very
comfortable with talking about their estate compared to 45 percent of
Boomers who say they are very comfortable.
> Parents are far more comfortable discussing the
content of their wills than their children realize, with 71 percent of
parents saying they are very comfortable compared with 54 percent of
children.
> Boomers underestimate the importance that
parents place on providing for their heirs, improving their children's
lifestyles, helping their children prepare for retirement, and helping
grandchildren attend college.
> Significantly more older parents report having
important estate planning documents such as living wills and durable
power of attorneys than Boomers report they are aware of.
> Almost all older parents report talking to
their children about their estate plan but fewer Boomers claim to have
had this discussion.
> In general, Boomers say that their actual
knowledge about their parents' estate issues is significantly less than
their parents claim.
"Our research indicates a clear 'Generation Gap' in
communicating about estate planning," Mohyde said. "Families need help
in bridging this gap and tackling these issues." To this end, Mohyde
provided the following tips:
> Focus first on things you agree on. Both
parents and their Boomer children are ultimately looking out for each
other's best interests.
> Given this, discussion should focus on where
parents and children can help each other rather than where they might
disagree.
> Build on shared values. The Hartford survey
showed that older parents place more value on helping their children
accomplish important financial goals such as improving their lifestyles,
securing their retirement, and educating their grandchildren than their
children realize. Talking about shared values can lead to discussions
about estate planning.
> Parents should reach out first. Because older
parents are more comfortable talking about estate planning, it's easier
for them to bring up the topic with their children. If a child cuts the
conversation short, pick another time to discuss the issue but be
persistent.
> Boomers should remember that their parents are
comfortable talking about estate planning. If an older parent has not
brought it up, Boomers should take heart. Older parents are not only
comfortable discussing estate planning, they are more receptive to
suggestions about planning such as writing a will than children realize.
> Boomers should ask how they can help parents
maintain their independence. Estate planning can involve drawing up
important legal directives such as a durable power of attorney, living
will or health care directive. These directives can play a big part in
helping older parents ensure their wishes are carried out, even if their
health fails. Asking parents about the steps they have taken in these
areas can be an important opening to talk about larger estate planning
issues.
"What we've learned from our survey and
conversations with older adults is that estate planning is really not
about money, it's about creating lasting bonds within families," Mohyde
said. "By reaching out, families can help cement those bonds and
preserve memories for generations."
Additional information is available at
http://www.hartfordinvestor.com.
The Hartford's internet address is
http://www.thehartford.com.
The Hartford is The Hartford Financial Services
Group, Inc. and its subsidiaries, including the issuing companies of
Hartford Life Insurance Company and Hartford Life and Annuity Insurance
Company.
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